Tuesday, July 17, 2012

On Fixing Things

"Can we fix it? Yes we can!" - Bob the Builder

This weekend was focused on home improvement, specifically our powder room which finally got a much-needed facelift. Goodbye, 1986. Hello, 2012.

All the destruction, scraping, patching, repairing, painting, and clearing out the old for the new, made me ponder upon how this summer has been all about "fixing" -- fences and decks, relationships and bad habits.

If you think about it, home improvement is similar to life improvement. Although, in my opinion, one is significantly easier than the other. In order to renovate, you have to demolish. Whether it's knocking down walls or allowing yourself to mourn a loss, you need to strip everything else away, start at the base or the bottom, and rebuild.

When you demolish, you find yourself standing in the middle of a mess. Typically, a mess YOU created. At first, you feel incredibly vulnerable. Twitchy. Even a little shocked, especially when you realize there's no turning back. You have two choices, dwell in the mess, or use the mess to your advantage and let it propel you.

And, this is where Bob the Builder comes into the picture. "Can we fix it?"

 Bob says we can.

I disagree.

In fact, If you asked me six months ago, I would've said, "Hell, yes, we can fix it! Let's do whatever it takes and get it done!"

For me, being motivated is never the problem. My issue is that I can get so focused on "fixing" and getting it done quickly, that I'm no longer present for the journey that actually makes it all happen.

Does that even make sense?

In any case, I get it. The goal isn't to simply fix, it's about the process of rebuilding. And, before you can rebuild, you need to dwell in the chaos for a bit...uncomfortable (and, yes, twitchy) and with eyes wide open. When you trust that the dust will settle (it always does), you find yourself armed with new, improved tools for reconstruction.

So, back to the bathroom renovation (because that's what we are talking about, right?!). It's almost done and it was truly a team effort (me, the husband, and my parents). It just needs is a few finishing touches. A trip to IKEA this weekend should take care of that. IKEA makes everything better.

If only that were true.

The question isn't, "Can we fix it?"

I think the better question to ask is, "Was it worth it?"

Yes. Yes it was. Yes it is.

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